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by Christopher Lee

GWAR, a band that needs no introduction! Intergalactic, inbred, infamous, and inhuman rock n' roll villains! Crypt Magazine was granted a rare opportunity to interview frontbeast Oderus Urungus, and chat about the making of their 13th record "Battle Maximus"! Read on human filth!!!!

Crypt: This is the first record GWAR that was conceived all on your own without ANY human help, so you guys produced it and engineered it all by yourselves? Were you ingesting inhuman amounts of crack during the process!?

Oderus: Yes we did, with the exception of Glen Robinson, uh, producer from Canada who worked with us on the "America Must Be Destroyed" and "War Party" albums, he did the actual mixing, but as far as the actual recording and engineering, we did everything ourselves in our own Slave Pit Studios!

Crypt: It sounds amazing, especially with headphones with the guitars panning left and right, the sound of the drums, that distinct GWAR guitar sound, it's definitely the best thing you guys have done in a while, I think the track "They Swallowed The Sun" is incredible, classic GWAR! I hope you will be performing that live when you tour in support of "Battle Maximus"!?

Oderus: Well actually we are, we immediately picked that as one of the strongest tracks on the record and that has been getting the live treatment, and uh, people are reacting very strongly to it, and yeah, I think allot of people really feel that the new album is kind of a return to some more of uh, our thrash metal roots but benefits from our continual learning more about the recording process. So uh, so ya know, its kind of best of both worlds, a little bit more, uh, better at doing what we do, and but at the same time kind of a throwback to what we did best!

Crypt: Well it's great, the songs are relentless, there is not one track I would even consider "filler"! Were these songs all written with Flattus Maximus or after he passed away? GWAR has always been about satire and shitting on everything that deserves to be shit on, but you guys sound really fired up, where did that come from after 13 records?

Oderus: Well yeah, allot of it was definitely based on uh, the feelings of anger and loss and just generally being pissed off at the universe for losing Flattus at such an early stage of his life, so yeah, allot of those feelings of hatred can be found on this record, the record is an attempt to at the same time, tell the next chapter in the story of GWAR but at the same time paying homage to Flattus, ya know, and not an easy thing to do, the fans of course are going to be looking to this record and really wondering, uh, what the hell GWAR is gonna sound like!? Allot of people credit Flattus kind of for single handedly saving GWAR from, uh, "musical noodeledum" when putting out lots of very self-indulgent records and though people seem to think WE hate these records, far from it, they were just the records we made at the time, but Flattus definitely lead us into our rebirth as a metal band, and when we lost him, I know allot of people were very worried that we would lose our sense of direction as a band, and uh, I am here to show you and tell you and let everyone listen to Battle Maximus and assure everyone that uh, this certainly is not true, the new GWAR is back, mightier than ever, with perhaps, our greatest record to date!

Crypt: What are you most proud of about GWAR considering you are one of the few bands who has NEVER relented, compromised, never kissed up to the industry or press or anyone else, and somehow with attacking all those who deserve it, making all the right enemies, you guys have had a career that has lasted what, 25 years!?

Oderus: I believe 28! Before you know it, we will be celebrating our 30th anniversary, which is almost too terrible to contemplate!

Crypt: I just recently saw some of the photos from the first annual GWAR BQ, it looks like it was one hell of a time, I noticed that you guys finally had your way with our lord and saviour Jesus Christ!?

Oderus: Yes Jesus went down and we kept beating the hell out of Jesus repeatedly, and for some reason he kept getting back up! Kind of like that Hitler motherfucker! Allot of these presidents of yours, we kill them on a nightly basis, yet they seem to "grow them" in some special room underneath the Pentagon! So, um, yeah so as much as try to slay all the worthy humans, worthy of the death dance with GWAR, you humans do seem to enjoy fucking each other and killing! So its like I can't keep up with it, your making babies faster than I can snuff them out! We don't want to have to resort to using nuclear weapons, this is simply not the GWAR way! But I refuse to continue to go on like this, it is something that I will consider!

Crypt: So is there anyone left for GWAR to kill at this point? Besides a whole slew of celebrities who are famous for nothing, teaching illiterate kids that the path to success is a pretty face!?

Oderus: I don't really know, but it's a pathetic state of affairs, I watched a few clips from the uh, what do you call it, VMA Awards last night, and I must say, I am so happy that they just continue to snub the metal community, I've never been prouder to be a metalhead than after watching that relentless display of absolute garbage the human race was presented with! If that is the cutting edge of what uh, entertainment is supposed to be about, where music is at nowadays, then things have gotten really, really, really bad, and uh, you guys need GWAR more than ever!

Crypt: Yes we do! Alice Cooper made a great comment years ago, the best music should always reflect whats going on culturally, bands like Cooper, The Doors, etc, came along when the country was at war, people were pissed off, and it mirrored the times! Yet it seems now as our culture declines, and our world circles the toilet thanks to the people we appoint, the music just gets fucking dumber, the people get dumber, and all they do is feed the mainstream mindless garbage like fertilizer... Whats your take on that!?

Oderus: Why totally! More than ever it seems like your "pop stars" are created by music companies before they even become known to the public, they are introduced to you as "super stars", ya know, there's no coming up through the ranks anymore, like these guys, like (imitates announcers voice) "this is the next thing you are really gonna like"! And you don't really have much of a choice in the matter! Um, and at the same time it gets harder and harder for bands, for metal bands especially, to come up with new ideas because, I mean lets face it, you cannot but reinvent the wheel only so many times, ya know? It uh, it's very, very difficult to continue to come up with new and uh, original metal riffs, metal compositions, when basically every style of metal has been done, and redone eight million times, you got your "sludge rockers", and your "thrash metallers", and your "blast beats", and your "grindcores", and your this and your that, and uh, for everyone one of these genres that comes out it just takes uh, another piece of pie disappears, and it just gets harder and harder for bands to do things that are truly original! The upside of that is, the few bands that do rise through this sea of utter mediocrity, occasionally you will find little fart bubbles that come to the top that are actually quite sweet in smell!

Crypt: For years I have been hearing the argument "its all been done with a guitar", and I always say, "there are how many chords on a guitar"!? You can always come up with a great original riff, all the best riffs have all not already been written, there's always room for more!

Oderus: Oh definitely not, its just got a little more difficult to come up with stuff that's truly original, but riffs are still out there, I don't believe that every single awesome metal song that can be written HAS been written yet! And uh, that would really suck if that were so, because if I felt that way we would have quit making albums quite a long time ago! So, we wouldn't do it, unless we felt like we had a chance of doing something original and interesting with our music, we're not into it just to play Scumdogs Of The Universe over and over again, ya know!? We want to make new music all the time!

Crypt: Exactly! And speaking of that record, the critics will never get it, but just like with KISS, or any other visual/theatrical bands, I love that, that's what drew me to you guys after seeing you on MTV's "The Week In Rock" show from 1990 live at the CMJ Marathon, but regardless of all that, I think Scumdogs Of The Universe is a classic! I still put it on once in a while, everything about it is great, "Horror Of Yig", "Vlad The Impaler", etc, great songs, great melodies, brilliant shit! So my question is, with all these bands cashing in doing tours where they play one of their most successful records in its entirety 20 years later, do you see any chance of GWAR doing that with Scumdogs and bringing back members of the old show!?

Oderus: Oh sure! And I am sure we will do that at some point!

Crypt: Really!?

Oderus: But we'd rather do it on Broadway ya know!?

Crypt: LOL!

Oderus: Yeah we'd love to lug that whole fucking thing around the entire country and set it up on Broadway for a month or two, ya know, if Spiderman can do it, then so can GWAR!

Crypt: Will there ever be a return of Techno Destructo?

Oderus: Well lets certainly hope so, I mean he can usually be seen carrying half of my brain out, I need every molecule that I can hold onto at this point. Ah, my grip of reality is tenuous at best! As much as Techno Destructo, uh, as much as I hope he never gets me in the "nuclear brainlock" again, I'm sure the fans would love it! Ya know, and I am at heart a showman, so uh, if it means getting my brain ripped out every night in front of cheering thousands, then so be it! Let Techo destructo return!

Crypt: What is your favorite GWAR song, which one gets the cuddlefish erect!?

Oderus: Um, ya know I would have to say, its gonna be silly, but I would say "Sick Of You", because A. it's usually the last song in the set, um, B. the hugest reaction out of the crowd, because ya know, it is probably the signature GWAR song, the closest thing we ever had to a quote unquote "HIT", so it gets a massive crowd reaction we definitely feed off of that, ANNNNDDDDDD...the third reason, the breakdown part in the middle, I can basically insert any 4/4 song in history into that part, so, you'll often find me singing Bruce Springsteen or Men At Work, during that part, so I enjoy that part as a musician!

Crypt: And I am sure allot of fans, would love to know the stories behind making that record as well as America Must Be Destroyed, which are classics, do you have any intentions of releasing those records with liner notes or songs that didn't make it on the records, another thing bands have to do now to sell records and make a living since most humans are cheap fucks and don't pay for music at all at this point?

Oderus: Well you would think we would be working on that, and that would be happening constantly, but I have no idea, ya know, I'm a fucking god demon from outer space looking for a penguin to fuck, ya know... Who has time to count money when all I can really do is eat crack!

Crypt: OK, let's play word association! I'll give you some names, tell me what comes to mind with one word!

Miley Cyrus - "meat grinder"
LORDI - "costume band"
Mumford & Sons - "sounds like a skin condition"
Motley Crue - "never...were any good"
Kanye West - "most overrated artist in history"
Dancing With The Stars - "is it cancelled yet?"
Dubstep - "don't even know what it is"
Twitter - "35,000 followers!"
Black Veil Brides - "um, hate to admit it, but we enjoy having sex with them"!

Crypt: When do you start the US tour for "Battle Maximus"!?

Oderus: Ah, the album drops September 17th, and the US tour starts in October sometime, that's the best I can do!

And finally, when was the last time you had contact with Slymenstra Hymen, is she still alive? Is she frozen somewhere in Antarctica waiting for GWAR to thaw her out!?

No, no, she's infesting the world of Hollywood right now, she's assumed an entirely different form, I'm not gonna blow her cover for her, but she's basically uh, insinuating and infecting from the inside, so yes, we are in close contact with Slymenstra, and we wish her all the best in her endeavors, and I uh, fully expect to get whacked upside the head with a bloody tampon at some point in the near future!

*So with that, we bid Oderus adieu, as he is off to be interrogated by an endless parade of human parasites who claim to be journalists, while sucking the corporate seed! Be sure to pick up "BATTLE MAXIMUS" on September 17th, like the good slave you are!!!!

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